Life Doesn’t Always Turn Out Like You Plan It

In 2014, I made a promise to myself to attend the 2020 Summer Olympics in Tokyo, Japan.

At the time, I was working as an office manager at a dental clinic. I was also newly single, and renting a room in a house where I shared a kitchen and bathroom with three other roommates.

I had no way of knowing that in just five years’ time, I would work for a public relations firm, meet my now fiancé and move in with him.

As such, due to my change in circumstances, so too did my priorities shift. I had initially been saving religiously to fund a trip to Japan, which would entail finding accommodations and purchasing the expensive tickets for Olympic events. I eventually abandoned my saving commitment, and used my money for more immediate needs in my life.

I lamented my lack of discipline, regretful that I wouldn’t be able to fulfill a dream five years in the making.

But hindsight is 20-20. And 2020 became subject to a global catastrophic event the likes of which hadn’t been seen in well over a century.

Now? I couldn’t be more thankful where I am in my life. If I had been committed to my 2014 goal, I likely would have been still alone, sequestered in my little room, with absolutely nothing to show for my years of sacrifice.

It just goes to show there’s absolutely no way to anticipate how life will turn out for you.

We can plan for the future. We can safeguard for the future. But there’s no way to predict what’s to come. The year 2020 has flipped that notion clear on its head.

After my city began its lockdown measures, I had taken a brief hiatus from creative writing, opting to focus more on my new responsibilities with working from home.

Fast-forward to now. I’m officially laid off from my job, and will remain as such until the end of the summer (best-case scenario).

Despite my circumstances, I am overcome with an immense sense of gratitude.

True – I won’t be working. But what I’ve lost in employment I’ve gained in opportunity. To look at it another way: I haven’t had a summer vacation since I was in the 9th grade!

What I could do this summer (if I wasn’t social distancing, of course)

I’m taking all of this as a cosmic message from the universe that insists I use my newfound free time to devote to the one talent I am good at, above all else: writing. There are no more excuses.

So, I’ll be resuming my weekly contributions to my site. I’ll be kicking the efforts on my novel into overdrive. And I will be starting those creative projects that I’ve always wanted to do but never had the time for in the past.

I couldn’t have known at the start of the year what would happen when I bought my gratitude journal. It is now my Bible and what keeps my thoughts grounded during difficult times.

I couldn’t have known in February when I impulsively bought a ticket to see Dorian Electra that all public events would be postponed or cancelled. I now cherish the experience and am grateful for the opportunity to attend an event, as many people won’t get the same chance this year.

I couldn’t have known at the start of 2020, as I reached a breaking point in what I thought I wanted out of life and writing, that I would eventually have only my writing to get me through the middle part of the year. I am now taking the experience to truly understand what I want out of life and what my role and purpose in the world.

The world is facing uncertain times. I can only hope that through the uncertainty, we all come out on the other side with a better sense of who we are, and a better idea of our purpose.

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